WRONG MAILBOX

carol put a letter in the willhagen's mailbox
thought it was her boyfriend brett's
it said "what you did last night took me straight to heaven
i don't think that i've come down yet"
when willamena willhagen read what carol wrote
she called her husband harold downtown
she said "don't think i don't know what you've been up to"
then slammed that receiver back down

old man willhagen turned to bobby bartlett
said "willamena knows about the game"
mad as hell he threw a punch that nearly blinded bob
he knew his buddy had to be to blame
bob stumbled back into missy ann middleton
just as she lit a cigarette
you can well be certain when her hand hit the curtains
they went up in flames in nothing flat

     that's how it happened, i swear that it's true
      gotta be careful 'bout the things that you do
      step on a crack and the whole world rocks
      carol put a letter in the wrong mailbox

when the volunteers gathered, fire chief mathers
hit the lights and pulled out into traffic
right into the back of the carson's cadillac
just missing martha moore's maverick
martha turned hard into the mall courtyard
bouncing off of others all the while
there was flying glass and metal and when the dust had settled
there were 37 cars in a pile

with the fire truck stuck, downtown was out of luck
five blocks burned to the ground
except for the ihop and half of betty's beauty shop
there's not much left of this town
boyfriend brett said "it's a sure bet
there's no work in a town this fried"
so he headed west, but before he left
he asked carol to be his bride

      that's how it happened, i swear that it's true
      gotta be careful 'bout the things that you do
      step on a crack and the whole world rocks
      carol put a letter in the wrong mailbox